Thursday, June 17, 2010

6 Pounds from Goal...

Here I sit... 6 pounds from goal.

6 pounds...

6 pounds might as well be 50. I can't believe the week I've had.

I've actually gained 5 pounds since last Saturday's weigh in. So technically, I'm 11 pounds from goal. What the heck!?


For no reason, I decided to have pizza Tuesday night. That wouldn't have been so bad, but I had 2 cheesy bread sticks and about 8 or 10 of those Hershey's Chocolate Dunkers from Pizza Hut. The picture says it all.


Then for another "no reason at all" we decided to splurge last night and went out for steak. We haven't been out to eat in SO long (other than the obligatory Saturday lunch with the in-laws) in forEVER.


Steak wouldn't have been all that bad if I didn't get the buttery mashed potatoes to go with it and the salad with chipotle ranch dressing and the cheese fries as an appetizer (of course, loaded with bacon and cheese and TONs of ranch dressing).


Why?


No reason in particular. I guess I was just feeling particularly self-destructive.


I've eaten sensible since then. But I think I've done too much damage to be repaired in time for Saturday morning's weigh in.


I don't get it. I know what to do and I just don't do it. And I take no pleasure in it whatsoever.


Does this ever happen to you? What do you guys do when you do this? Please help me get past this. I just want to be at goal. I've been 10 pounds away from goal since a year ago this month. Now that I'm getting so close, why is this happening. I just want to be done!

.

6 comments:

Nichole said...

Keep looking at your "before" pictures. Own the fatness, embrace the reality, dive deep and burn the rest of those jigglies off!!!!! FOREVER~

Miz said...

as you know it is SO FLIPPING NORMAL to have the (even subconscious) "frick Im so close to what I have wanted and longed for for so long IM GONNA SABOTAGE MYSELF!!" days.

most important is that you realize.

next is the changing of the behavior.

what do you fear?
for me the answer was journaling about that.
writing without stopping or editing and putting it away for a day or so and THEN yanking out and rereading.

Carla

Buttercup said...

I've done it too. My goal is that I won't do it this time and can focus on the goal and keep going to the goal. Wishing you the ability to refocus and know you will.

GinasBookkeeping said...

I think we have all been down that road. Some of us a lot sooner than others in our journey to healthy weight.

I would say a good thing to do if you can trust the people close to you is to give them permission to ask the question: "Are you sure you want to order that? Are you sure you want to eat that?" This needs to be a non-judgmental person who loves you just the way you are but knows you want better for yourself. You have to remain the person to make the decision with out any judgment from the other person. It just gives voice to your thoughts and makes you think harder about your decisions. Maybe there are a few people in your life that are always around during these situations.

Ms. Cairo said...

If you look at the statistics, 99% of people who successfully reach their target weight GAIN IT ALL BACK within a year.

It looks like you are on this road.

As someone who has successfully lost weight and kept it off, I hope you'll take my advice. Forget about reaching your target weight. Concentrate on maintaining the weight you're at now!!!!!

What you need to do is realize that your body has not yet "settled in" to your new weight, and it wants nothing more than to regain that 104 pounds. You need to eat any damn food you want, but in small portions, and exercise, and realize that you want to be at this weight because it is healthy and for no other reason.

You must maintain your healthy eating habits for at least three months before you start any "happy" binges. Once your body settles in to your new weight, you can binge once a week and you won't gain any weight. If you binge now - you'll gain five pounds.

Hang in there. You've taken off 104 pounds. YOu've done the easy bit. The hard bit is yet to come. But in three more months - it WILL become easy also.

...tallens said...

Cara, I love your honesty throughout this post. You're speaking for lots of us out there in the weight-loss-world. Thank you.