Wednesday, April 30, 2008

traffic court and hot dogs...

Today was a little busier at work. Tomorrow is proof day for the magazine and so I had a ton of pages to finalize so the editors can proof them tomorrow. Of course, everything comes in last minute so I feel like I'm way behind. Will have to go in early tomorrow to get a jump on things to make sure everything stays on schedule.

'Nuff about work... I'm still up a few pounds from last Sat's WI. Not exactly sure why, I'm just going with the punches right now. Last Sat I was up 8/10 of a pound from the previous Sat. Now, I'm up about 4 more pounds. And it doesn't seem to be dropping off like it does sometimes during the week.

Deep breath... These things happen... All is not lost... (she says calmly while biting her fingernails to the nubs)

I didn't get to walk with the girls this morning. Last night, late, my daughter tells me that she has to drive downtown to traffic court (long story, short... to get some points taken off her license). Of course, I'm not letting her drive all the way down there by herself. It's a half hour away and she's only been driving solo for about 3 months. So I find out that they open at 7:30 so we decide to go down there when they open, hoping that by some miracle from heaven, I'll be able to make it to work on time (at 8:30). Well, that didn't happen. Apparently, the court house must of taken a few lessons from the airports and they screen everyone before you can enter the building. We walk through the massive stone and iron front doors only to fine like 100 people standing in a turn-style, rope-lined, assembly line waiting to be scanned and pillaged by the security team. What an ordeal!

It ends up I was only a half hour late to work today. Not bad, actually. I thought I'd be hours late.

Glad that's over with. Now, instead of my auto insurance quadrupling, it'll only triple come renewal time. Ugh!

Oh, and the orange pineapple pie I made was AWESOME! Man, it might be even better than the strawberry pie (if that's even possible).

I have a question for you guys... how do you like your hot dogs? My mother and I were discussing how we like our hot dogs and it occurred to me that there are probably a million different ways to have them topped and most of the different ways are regional. How do you like your hot dog?

Tuesday, April 29, 2008


Quite a boring day today at work. I didn't exercise this morning. I took the day off from exercising. I really wanted to jog some more, but I don't want to push it. I'm only supposed to do it 3 times a week anyway. I've stayed on points, so far, today. I'm getting in plenty of fiber, protein and dairy.

I had Flax Flakes with ff milk for breakfast with a yummy 6 Weeks Muffin with a little Land O Lakes light butter. Plenty of fiber and dairy there. For lunch I had a chicken breast with broccoli and a salad with oil & vinegar dressing. And for dinner was a WW frozen dinner (Orange Sesame Chicken with rice) and some sweet corn. For dessert, I'm having a yummy Orange Pineapple pie I made last night. I used the same Strawberry Pie recipe I got from my mom but used fresh pineapple and orange Jello instead of strawberry. Can't wait to try it!

I ran into an old WW buddy today at lunch. She was such an inspiration for me when I first started. She hasn't been to a meeting in almost 6 months, now. She's gained a little back, but I didn't want to be rude and ask her how much. She kept saying how great I looked. The last time she was at a meeting, I was 50 lbs heavier. It was sad, though, because I don't know if she knew how much she really helped motivate me in the beginning. I tried to tell her but I think she was so down on herself for falling away that she didn't want to hear it. She would lose anywhere from 3-7 or 8 pounds a week when she was on-plan. Which was WAY too much! But our leader kept telling her she was doing okay (ugh!). I really don't think she was doing okay. Every once in a while it's okay to kick it in the pants and lose an extra 4 or 5 pounds in a week. But not on a regular basis. It's no wonder she fell away. She was probably burnt out on it all from the extreme dieting she was obviously doing. But all that aside, she was still an inspiration to me.

It's funny how you can be an inspiration for somebody and never know it. Once you find out about it (if you do) you feel flattered and get the warm-fuzzy feeling inside like your life is actually for a reason on this planet, you know? Has that ever happened to you?

I'm walking with the girls in the morning. The four of us haven't been 4-strong in over two weeks. One of us will keep pooping out for one reason or another at different times. Most times it'll end up being just 2 of us or maybe 3. And one of us is sick right now so we'll only be 3-strong in the morning. I know, sick, you can't help. They help keep me motivated, though. I wouldn't be exercising at all if it weren't for being accountable to them two days a week. Sort of inspired me to do more exercise on the off-walk days.

Monday, April 28, 2008

5K here I come...

I did it!

I did all 8 sets of my first week of interval training on the c25k regiment.

I'm so excited. I can actually jog now. I was so afraid of it. Afraid I was going to die if I jogged. I would have a panic attack as soon as I'd start running.

Not anymore. I have overcome yet another fear in this weight loss battle.

I feel great, too! I jogged for 60 seconds then walked for 90 seconds and did that 8 times in a row. I feel like I could conquer the world right now!

(Now, if I can just keep my eating in check!)

Has anyone else ever done this c25k thing?

Hey, Donna, how's the c25k thing going for you?

Sunday, April 27, 2008

good weekend, bad sunday...

Okay, so we got back from our weekend today and I totally made a pig out of myself. I did relatively good while we were away. Maybe that's why I went overboard today. I had real scrambled eggs (no egg beaters) with real cheese and hash browns with real cheese and a bagel with real cream cheese (is anyone catching the fact that I miss real cheese?). And as if that weren't bad enough, tonight I had a double cheese burger and fries from Steak N Shake.

Well, I think I've gotten it out of my system, though. All I want to do now is go for a run. Get it out of my system. It's too late tonight, but I've definitely going tomorrow morning. Can't wait!

I don't even want to attempt at tracking the points I ate today. And I was so good this weekend, too.

We had so much fun, hubby and me. We went to a remote control airplane show a couple of hours away. It was an international competition. People came from UK, Australia and even one guy from Taiwan. Their planes are just awesome. They're usually 1/5, 1/4 and 1/3 scale planes. They have certain maneuvers they have to accomplish and they're graded on them by the judges. And at the end, they give awards and trophies. It's pretty serious stuff.

The "half time" shows (during lunch break) were the best. There were stunt plans doing all kinds of acrobatics and just some really cool looking planes.

Was way too hot, but we still had a blast.

The best part was just getting away with my hubby.

How was your weekend?

Thursday, April 24, 2008

overcoming ghosts from my past...

There's a lady I work with who had knee surgery and as a result is going to be out of work for a while recuperating. She can't put any pressure whatsoever on her knee for two weeks. Complete bed rest. So a bunch of us at work got together and decided to cook her meals for her for these two weeks. We each took two days and one person is taking the meals to her each afternoon.

So the story starts out pretty nice, right...

Well, so I decided to make her a casserole. Actually, it was an excuse to make one of my favorite foods on this planet... Connecticut Beef Supper, a yummy casserole from Betty Crocker in the early 70's.

I haven't been able to make it over the years because my family doesn't like mushrooms. (Pic to right is from the recipe card.)

Tender beef stew meat with onions are on the bottom, on top of that are sliced potatoes, covering it all is a mixture of sour cream, cream of mushroom soup, and milk, so it drips down over the potatoes, beef and onions, and topped with shredded cheddar cheese. It's the yummiest thing I could possibly think of.

Well, because she's only one person, I made a half casserole for her. The problem with that statement is that I made a full casserole from the ingredients and put it into two half casserole dishes to bake separately. One for her and one for...

So I figured I'd have a small portion and throw the rest of it away. But I thought, what a waste of food. So I decided to give it to the only person I know of who's not on a diet, my father-in-law. But I could never make it out to his house.

So last night I pulled it out to toss it because it's almost a week old in the fridge. I open it up and smelled it and it still smells fresh. So what do I do? Yup, I fix myself a 2" square portion. Tiny little thing. Tiny little piece of heaven!

Oh my gosh! It was better than I had remembered it! "Hello Old Friend!"

Now came the problem. How on God's green Earth was I going to be able to toss it?? Not now,. Not after I've tasted it. If ever there was a "red light food", this is it!!

I did the smart thing, well the only thing I could think of, and put it back in the fridge and ate something healthy to get that wonderful taste out of my mouth. It worked. I didn't want any more of it.

Well... that night.

But it was still in my fridge.

What was I going to do??

How was I going to be able to throw it away??

So today at lunch time, I broke down and had another serving. This has got to be one of the all time lowest points in my life since I started WW a year ago. This serving was about twice (okay, a little more than twice) the size of the last one. AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!! I can't believe I did that!!!

But here comes the redeeming part of this story. As soon as I was done eating it, I threw the rest of the casserole in the trash.

Yup! I have conquered Mount Connecticut-Beef-Supper! And now it's gone! Leveled it flat. Blew it up like... well, you get the picture.

I will not be making Connecticut Beef Supper EVER again! I think it's something like 15 points per serving. I'm sure I could make it with reduced fat and fat free stuff, but it would not taste the same and some things just shouldn't be messed with. This is one of them.

I'm over it now, though. But I did sniff, sniff (tears) a little bit when I went to throw something away this evening and saw it sitting on the top of the trash.

Gone, behind me, though. Onward and upward!

P.S. I won't be blogging this weekend. Not to fret, I'll be back at it on Monday.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

walking, running and dogs...

Had a great walk this morning. There are normally 4 of us that walk, but one is out of town and one "called in sick" so it was just the two of us. The two who started first together. Was nice. Though I did miss the other two.

We tried doing more of the c25k. This was her first try at it, though she's a little more in shape than I am and weighs about 40 pounds lighter than I do, so it wasn't that bad for her the first time like it was for me. Still, we just did 4 sets of 60 seconds running and 90 seconds walking.

I think I'll do it again Friday morning and just keep it to 4 sets. It ends up being a total of 4 minutes running and 6 minutes walking. Sounds so measly when I say it like that. But in the grander scheme of things, 4 minutes is HUGE.

I'm not afraid to run any more. I was totally relaxed this morning and felt great at the end of every run. I'm sure I could do all 8 sets. But I don't want to push it. The last thing I want to do is burn out on this or go to fast that I get hurt or start hating it.

I had an okay day yesterday. Work is going smoothly. I had Cracker Barrel for lunch (egg beaters, turkey sausage and bran muffin - I know, for lunch, right?) and then a roasted chicken with mashed potatoes and green beans for dinner. Was probably too much food. No, i know it was too much food. But at least it was high in protein and fiber. I was up a half a pound from yesterday morning, but I'm not worried about it.

I gotta tell you a funny story about my puppies. I have two pups, a Chihuahua and a Lab/Sheppard mix. The little one is about 9 lbs and the big one is about 90 lbs. Big dog LOVES to eat little dog's food so we have to keep it up and little guy can only eat when one of us is in the room guarding him. So yesterday I was siting there waiting for him to get done eating and I see big dog laying about 3 feet behind the little guy as he eats. Like she's just sitting there waiting to get his food. So the little guy likes to flick his tiny food pieces out of his bowl one at a time then he goes and chases the food piece and eats it. A little eating game he plays with himself. So he starts doing that and a little piece of food flings behind him and before he can see where it went, it landed between big dogs paws. So they both look at it for a second. Big dog says "thank you food god for sending me morsels from heaven". Little dog says "crap, how am I going to get that piece of food now!". So big dog eats it and looks up at little dog who has a look of total amazement on his face. So little guy walks back over to his bowl and does the EXACT SAME THING. Same dilemma, same look on their faces and big dog eats it. This goes on two more times before little guy sits down and looks at big guy for a second, probably saying to himself "okay, no more, you're not getting another bite". Then he stops flicking his food out of his bowl. Was weird seeing him eat his food out of his bowl. He'll usually only do that when he's absolutely starved. I think he was afraid of losing one more precious bit of food.

Was the funniest thing to watch. Dogs are cool to watch and get a chuckle out of!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008


I did it. Well, actually, I didn't do it. What I mean is I didn't feel like I was going to die this morning when I did my c25k workout again. It was awesome! I only did 4 sets again (but only because I had to go to the bathroom so bad, eh-em) but if it weren't for that I'm sure I could have done the whole 20 minutes!

I think the problem was that I was panicked about running so when I did the 60 seconds of running, I tensed up, I think I even held my breath at certain points so when it was time to walk for 90 seconds I was completely out of breath and to tight I thought I was going to pass out.

So what I focused on this morning was muscle relaxation and controlled breathing. Who knew I'd have to teach myself how to run! As I started running, I focused on the muscles in my neck and shoulders and back and even rolled my head around a couple of times to focus in on it real hard. And I focused in on my breathing too, in through my nose, out through my mouth, steady.

It worked. I am victorious over the big bad running monster.


(and, no, that photo isn't me :)

Sunday, April 20, 2008

i started running today...

Well, I did it. I started the c25k program this morning. Was the coolest thing, my hubbie and daughter both are doing it with me. Hubbie doesn't much care for exercising outside (too hot most of the time down here in FL to exercise outside on a regular basis) and my daughter is, well, to her own admitting, she's a bit too lazy to run (sorry, babe). But I was so proud of both of them. Hubbie was on my left and daughter was on my right. Was the coolest thing!

Was funniest thing. Before we started, we were standing in the kitchen and they asked me okay, what's the plan. I said "hi, my name is Julie, I'll be your cruise director today". I thought it was hilarious. She's never hear of Love Boat and he, well, he thought probably what the rest of you are thinking.. hardy-har-har.

Anyway, so we started out with the 5 minute quick walk warm up... goin' good. Then came the first set of run for 60 seconds and walk for 90 seconds... goin' good. Then the next set... okay, getting a little more difficult, but I'd caught my breath enough during the last 90 seconds of walking that I was starting to think this might not be as bad as I thought. Then the next set of 60 seconds running and 90 seconds walking... um, not going so good... I was breathing soooo hard. I'm starting to wander if this is a good idea... Then the fourth set... After I ran the next 60 seconds I started getting light headed and I was breathing like I'd just ran a marathon or something. I couldn't do any more.

I couldn't believe it! I'm in better shape (though still 50 pounds overweight) than the two of them and I pooped out first. What's up with that???

I was so disappointed in myself. I was only able to do 4 sets and we had to walk the rest of the way home. Hubbie was just getting warmed up. Daughter admitted to me later that she was just about to say I'll meet you guys at home because it was kicking her butt too.

Oh, well, so I won't get it done in 9 weeks. Maybe 18. I guess it doesn't matter how long it takes as long as I keep at it slow and steady until I'm comfortable to take it to the next level. The website says it's okay to redo a week or two until you feel like you're ready to advance to the next week's level. I think I'll be redoing this week for a while until I can make it up to 8 sets (20 minutes). At least half way through the first day is better than stopping after the first set, right?

Oh, well.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

for such a bad week...

For such a bad week, I had a great weigh in!

I really didn't think I was going to lose anything. In fact, by Wednesday I was up 3 pounds from last Saturday's WI. I was eating similar foods (not exactly the same, but had the same calories, fat, fiber and protein) and exercising exactly the same. I had no idea what I was doing wrong. So I chalked it up to my wonderful (she says sarcastically) cycle of losing big one week then losing little for the next few weeks. Which, when it comes right down to it, really is a great cycle to be stuck in, you know?

But then along came Thurs morning. I have no idea what I did on Wednesday that was so different than Sun-Tues, but by Thurs morning I was back down to the weight I was last Saturday. Woo Hoo!!

I stayed home Thursday afternoon (remember my wonderful, beautiful Thursday afternoon?) and relaxed but I stayed up until 2pm (Fri morning) to finish reading that book I read Thurs afternoon. So I just knew when I weighed myself Friday morning that I'd be back up. For me, the less sleep I get the more I'll weigh. In fact, I can wake up at 2am and weigh myself and then go back to bed and then weigh myself when I wake up around 6 or 7 and I'll almost always be a half a pound if not a full pound lighter.

Friday morning I was down another pound. Who knows why. Like I said, same thing all week.

Anyway, this morning at WW WI I was down 1.4 pounds. Can't beat that with a stick!

I guess the moral to my story is, forget the day-to-day weigh ins, they'll drive you crazy. Just focus on the weekly WI's. That's all that counts anyway!

One more thing... My mom (check out her blog) had left a great recipe on one my comments last week for some bran muffins and I wanted to leave the recipe here again in case you guys missed it. I just made the recipe this morning and it was wonderful! The mix you make up ahead of time and keep it in your fridge and then just make one or two as you need them because the batter will stay good for 6 weeks in the fridge. Hence the name, 6 Weeks Muffins.

2 Points Each:
"6 Weeks Muffins"

1/2 cup boiling water
1/2 cup All Bran Cereal (I used Flax Flakes cereal because All Bran's ingredients showed Sugar and High Fructose Corn Syrup in it - you could probably use your favorite high fiber cereal, so long as the points aren't more than 2 per serving - My Flax Flakes were 2 points for 3/4 cup serving but I only used 1/2 cup in this recipe)
1/4 cup Shortening
(does anyone know a healthy substitute for shortening?)
1/4 cup Splenda (or 3/4 Sugar but then there's more points. I accidentally put 3/4 cup of splenda and it gave them a sweet flavor that was yummy)
1/4 cup egg beaters

1 cup low fat buttermilk (I used whole buttermilk but it added a point to each muffin - it's all I had in the fridge)
1 cup Kellogg's Special K
(if you have trouble going to the potty here is where you add another cup of All Bran Cereal) (I added more Flax Flakes)

1 1/4 cup Self Rising Flour
(I substituted Whole Wheat Pastry Flour)

In a small bowl, pour boiling water over the 1/2 c. bran cereal; set aside.
In a larger bowl, cream together the shortening, Splenda, egg and buttermilk. Add the Special K and mix well. Add flour and mix well. Fold in the water/cereal mixture. Spray Pam into muffin tin or use muffin papers. Fill to 3/4 full.

Bake at 400 degrees for 15-18 minutes (mine took about 25 minutes to cook).
Makes 1 dozen. - 2 points each (unless you use my substitutes, then they're 3 points each)


Thursday, April 17, 2008

my thursday was MUCH better (except for the pain)...

So, I played hookie from work this afternoon. Woo Hoo!!!

Actually, it was for a bad reason. My pre-menssie turned into a full blown menssie with raving cramps. (I know, more than you probably wanted to know!)

I should have know. With all the emotions pouring on. I should have known that the horrible pain was sure to follow.

So not very much was going on at work today. Sure I had some things to do, but if they waited until tomorrow, that would be okay. So I to a half personal day and went home and put my feet up on the couch and stayed there the rest of the afternoon.

The good thing was that I had this book that I've been so engrossed in for the past week and a half and have had NO time at all to read it. It's really spell pounding and compelling and I was getting so mad because I could only find 5 minutes a day to read it.

So I had about 4 hours to read it and I almost finished it. I had to quit at 5:30 when hubbie got home. I have only about 40 pages left. Ugh!!

Oh, well, the good thing is, at 5 minutes a day, I should have these last 40 pages read by, say, oh, NEXT WEEK!

Was a great afternoon, though. I opened the windows and let the sun and cool breeze in while propping my feet up and reading. No noises. No distractions. No TV. No nothing. Just me and my awesomely wonderful book.

Was a great afternoon.

How 'bout you guys? How does your day compare to mine?

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

another yukky wednesday...

Well, today was a little better than yesterday. I'm still down a bit, though. But at least I didn't eat my weight in food today.

Had my usual cream of wheat with honey and pumpkin for breakfast. And for lunch was a soup and salad. My after noon snack was a treat. I poured a cup of decaf coffee and put a dark chocolate kiss in the cup (no cream or sugar). Man, that was awesome! I wonder if that's better or worse than the cream and sugar I usually put in there. I don't know, but it was wonderful. Isn't dark chocolate supposed to be good for you, too? If it's good for me, shouldn't I eat more of it????

Dinner was a joke. We decided to splurge a little and go to Applebee's and try one of their WW dinners. We should have known things were looking bad when we got there and there was a wait because it was kid's night. So we had to sit in the bar at a high top. Then there was a dish I saw online that looked yummy, was chicken with a salsa ranch sauce, mozzarella & cheddar cheeses, and black bean & corn salsa. But alas, this Applebee's didn't offer it. So I settled for the steak and portobello mushrooms.

When it came out, we both laughed. It was 3 ounces, tops. Seriously! The thing was like 2 inches square. The side dishes were roasted potatoes WITH GARLIC and broccoli WITH GARLIC. In case you're wondering why I capitalized WITH GARLIC? It's because I think the cook is having an affair with GARLIC right now. I have never eaten anything so laden with garlic in my entire life. My mouth actually burnt because of so much garlic.

So I cut into the itty bitty steak and chewed on the first bite. Then I chewed and chewed and I couldn't get it to break up in my mouth. It was laced with gristle throughout. I cut a little bit more of the steak and it was horrible.

I had to send it back. There was no way I could chew it. They were apologetic and all, but then I had to wait another 25 minutes before my replacement meal was ready. Meanwhile, hubby had already finished eating his miniature dinner. So we sat and talked for a while before my dinner arrived.

The one consolation in the whole thing was that they comp'd my meal.

I've never liked Applebees. Now I know I don't like Applebees WW meals either.

Oh, well. At least I didn't go over my 23 points for today.

Oh, did I tell you I lost another point this past weekend. I used to have 24 points until I lost 75 pounds. Now I only have 23. It's just not fair!

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

a quick howdy...

I've been so psychotically busy these past few days. I've taken on a side job and it's taking more time than I wanted it to. But I wanted to post a quickie.

I think I'm pre-mensie because all I want to do is cry right now. For no good reason. All day. It's like if I could just cry and get it out of my system it'd be okay. But I have nothing to cry about. I hate this!

I totally over ate today, which I'm so mad about. But I slipped right back into my emotional eating habits. Food to cover the tears. I do hope I can grow out of this one day.

How have you guys been lately? (sniff, sniff)

Sunday, April 13, 2008

red light... green light...

So today I learned something new... WW says to identify your "red light" foods and avoid them like the plague. (So, for all you non-WW people, that's food that when you have just one bite of it, you can't stop until it's either all gone or you're so full you can't eat another bite.) I like to think I don't have very many of those types of food left, but alas, I found one tonight. Or rather two... Pillsbury refrigerator Chocolate Chip cookies straight out of the oven and then Doritos (not in conjunction with each other, of course).

So maybe once a month or so, my daughter and I will have video game night where we'll bake a batch of the Pillsbury cookies and sit down and eat them hot with a big glass of milk, and oh, yea, we'll play various video games.

Used to be, I'd sit down with her and before we're done playing games the entire plate (all 24 cookies) would be gone. And, yes, I was the one doing the majority of the eating (her limit is around 3 or 4).

Well, now, I have to put three cookies on a separate plate and ask her to put the rest of them out of my reach and sight. So I ate my three cookies (at 2.5 points each, mind you). And I was okay at first, but then those other cookies on the big plate kept calling my name... "Cara... we're over heeeeerrrre!" Taunting me! (Don't you hate it when cookies do that?!)

So then if that wasn't bad enough, she pulled out the big guns. She went into her room (which is where I told her she should keep the Doritos - out of my sight and reach) and brings out Cool Ranch Doritos. A whopping 3 points for ELEVEN chips. Not to mention the ingredients are hideous. Not to mention, I think there's some sort of addictive agent they put in those things. I swear, I CAN NOT each just ONE.

So there I sat with chocolate chip cookies just out of my reach and Doritos crunching in my ears. A girl can only take so much!

So I thought, why torture myself? Give in.

NO! I did not just say that!

So then I thought, What am I going to do??

I know, get something else to eat that's semi healthy for me and will fill the craving. So that's what I did.

We had taco salad last night (only 9 pts for the entire thing, woo hoo). And I remembered I still had some refried beans, etc. left over. So I went in the kitchen and plopped about a half cup of fat free refried beans in with about a 1/3 cup 2% shredded sharp cheddar cheese and stuck it in the microwave for about a minute then dolloped about a tablespoon of reduced fat sour cream on top of it and then lined the bowl with 13 of the bite-size round Tostitos that I absolutely love! The whole thing was only 5 points and it was truly amazing. It totally filled my cravings and satisfied me while I felt like I was cheating a little bit.

Oh, and the snack was healthy, to boot. I got extra fiber in the beans and dairy with the low fat cheese and sour cream (though, I don't think there was much healthy-ness in the Tostitos).

So lesson learned... when red light foods present themselves, find other totally yummy foods to take their place. Don't try to avoid them, that's all you'll ever think about.

By the way, I only went over my points today by a half a point. So all is under control.

So what kinds of foods do you substitute for your red light foods?

Saturday, April 12, 2008

it's official... i'm a loser... a BIG ONE...

Well, I did it. I hit my 75 lb goal (officially) this morning.

I weighed in at 188.4 on the WW scales.

That's actually 76.8 pounds I've lost since a year ago next month (May 12th).

I worked my butt off last week trying for it. I lost 3.2 pounds. I was real strict about EVERYTHING. I didn't overindulge on the weekend (last weekend) like I normally do. I only used about 5 of my flex points last weekend. And then throughout the week, I would only allow myself to go over my allotted 24 daily points if it was something healthy, like, say, peanuts, which are high in fat but it's a good fat that your body needs and has lots of protein and fiber. I ate bulky foods that would keep me full longer. And I focused on high fiber, high protein, no sugar substitute, foods high in vitamin A, I made sure I had at least one serving of veggies a day (which is good for me because I know I don't eat enough veggies and fruit). I had oranges for extra vitamin C. I had pumpkin and flaxseed oil and plenty of dairy every day. I'm telling you this whole thing was calculated.

Here's a pic of me comparing August 06 at 285 to now 188:

Okay, here's the thing... my weight loss has been cyclical from the start. I'll lose a big number and then the next few weeks will be next to nothing. So I don't know if it was my plan or if it was just time for me to lose big. So I'm going to try and do the same thing this coming week and see if it happens again.

Oh, yea, and I only exercised twice last week. (Bad Cara.) But this week, we're going to the gym every morning.

Oh, and here's the absolute best part...

I bought a pair of shorts last night and they're SIZE 14!!!!

I haven't fit in size 14 since before my 19 year old was born. I couldn't believe it. I tried on the size 16 and it seemed to be a bit loose so I asked my daughter to go get me a size 14 just for giggles and grins. And low and behold, they fit perfectly!!!

Can you believe it!!!????

So, how was your week?

(Oh, by the way, my mom finally started her own blog. You're comments were a great help. Thanks everyone!)

Thursday, April 10, 2008

guest blogger... my mom's words

Hi Guys,

I hope you enjoyed before when my mom guest blogged on here. She's got some amazing stories about her weight loss. So I hope you don't mind me sharing them here. Enjoy...

A Month is a Month is a Month

During the month of March, I was getting ready for a cruise. This was my second cruise and believe you me I was not looking forward to it. This, of course, must be explained, but briefly. My first cruise was the cruise from Hades. We hit a horrible storm and had 40 foot swells and I was in bed sick for 3 days. We couldn’t even get into one port because of the roughness. I swore I’d never go on another one. But, I let a friend talk me into it and here I was again.

I don’t really know what happened the two weeks before the cruise but I had stayed on my diet and was really good and gained 5 pounds the first week and gained 2.5 pounds the second week. I was so disgusted that I thought of quitting but having lost 50 pounds already I was thinking to myself that I’d gone so far already that I didn’t want to let my successes go to waste, so I let my thinking get back on track.

Well… I don’t know if you’ve ever been on a cruise or not but if you don’t like to eat, get drunk or gamble there isn’t much else to offer you while on board. I don’t like to gamble and drink only the occasional cocktail, usually a grasshopper after dinner when in a nice restaurant, so guess what that left…food! Wow, what wonderful food there is! And at any time of day or night. And it’s included in your fare, it doesn’t cost you anything extra. Since I had gained the two weeks before the cruise I had decided that I’d enjoy myself during the cruise (food wise) and get back to basics when I got home. I didn’t want to go hog wild (and didn’t) but I was going to enjoy myself in the only way that I could.

To begin with for dinner you can order as much of an item as you want so before every meal I ordered two shrimp cocktails. In this way I was being good since shrimp are low in points and it helped fill me up somewhat. I hadn’t had pasta in a while and the first night I ordered fettuccine alfredo. Wow, it was delicious. To my horror I could only eat one third of it and was full (well almost, I was saving some room for desert). By the fourth day, and after prime rib and beef Wellington and pizza and French fries and and and (it was a seven day cruise) I was missing my half can of soup and my half sandwich. Yeah, missing my diet! I couldn’t believe it! Missing the right food! What a wonderful thing for me! At that point I was aware that I have finally gotten my head on straight and will never be obese again. What a wonderful feeling it was and is.

When I returned home I had gained one more pound and I got back on it with a vengeance and I lost 4.5 pounds the first week. I didn’t even loose that much my first week on this thing. I felt great. And continue to feel great. I looked back at my weight chart and realized that I had lost a month because I am back to were I was 4 weeks ago. But, what the hey. Maybe your body and mind need a little break once in a while. In the past about once or twice a month I’d indulge in something that was fattening just to keep me on track the rest of the time and not crave the wrong stuff. I am of the mind set now that I need a week of indulgence to get me back in the right frame of mind. I’ve got 50 more pounds to go and right now I am ready to “get-r-done”. I’m not saying that everyone should do what I did. Some of you may do this and never get back on track, and that would be a bad thing. But if you are really committed to this weight loss regiment this might be the way to get yourself motivated again. It’s a thought.

Thank you Cara for getting me motivated in the first place on this long journey to a healthier me. Your starting WW got me to thinking about myself and how awful I looked when we took pictures of each other in Florida the winter of 2007. If it weren't for you I'd still be a big ole fat slob. I love you very much. Guess we could say we inspire each other. How wonderful for a mother and daughter to be so harmonious.

It's me again (Cara). Could I ask everyone to leave a comment for my mom. I'm trying to encourage her to start her own blog. If nothing else, then just to keep a journal of her weight loss. But maybe if we can leave her some comments, she'll think about starting one of her own. She thinks she doesn't have anything to say on a blog. :)

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

on my way to 75 lbs gone...

I've been so close to losing 75 pounds for about the last month and a half. Last week I really hit the wall when I gained 2/10ths of a pound. I started going in the other direction and it scared me. It just goes to prove my theory of how easily I could gain all this weight back once I make it to goal. I'm SOOO petrified of that.

But this morning, I weighed myself at home and was 188.8. I need to be 190 when I get to WW this Saturday morning. My scale at home is anywhere from 2/10ths to a pound less than at WW. So I should be okay. But I've been having such a hard time lately, I'm doubting myself.

I've been eating everything to the letter and trying to be healthy about it along the way. I've started taking Flaxseed Oil supplements because I have VERY little oil in my diet. I know the pills are a poor substitute, but at least I'm doing SOMETHING. I want to switch to regular flaxseed oil but it's very hard to find. I've been to 4 stores so far and nothing. I think I'm going to have to go to a health food store. I've been tempted to just get the ground flaxseed and sprinkle it on my cream of wheat in the morning but I don't think that will take care of my oil deficit.

I've been watching my sugar because I'm not eating artificial sweetener any more. I've been trying to get my sugar from natural sources like honey and fruits.

I'm trying to eat as many whole grains as possible. Baking with whole wheat flour. Eating whole wheat and whole grain bread. Etc.

I'm just so paranoid about not making it this week. I know... there's always next week. I'm just so tired of almost being there.

Why is this so hard? It was so much easier to gain the weight, wasn't it?

The main thing I'm looking for is a way to eat healthy. Not just "good". Or low-fat or low-calorie. But healthy. I figure that's the only way I can keep this weight off for a life time.

So what do you guys eat that's healthy? Maybe I can get some inspiration from you guys for a change.

Saturday, April 5, 2008

weigh in today wasn't really as bad as it sounded...

I'll start off by saying that I gained weight this week but I'm happy about that.

You're probably wondering how on earth someone could be happy about gaining weight?

Well, I'll tell you why I'm so happy...

It was only 2/10ths of a pound!!

I was really, seriously expecting to gain 2-3 lbs!!

You wouldn't believe all the crap I ate last week. I wont go into all the details, but I will say that I had two 5-point cookies, one 5-point brownie, an 18-point sandwich WITH FRIES, home made lasagna with real garlic bread with real butter, an 11 OUNCE STEAK (yes, people, I said ELEVEN OUNCES!!) with a baked potato with REAL butter and REAL sour cream, oh and I had french fries THREE times this week. AAAAHHHHH!!!

Well, I could go on. And I know you're going to be tempted to say congratulations for such a small weight gain, but please refrain. I don't deserve any congratulations at all.

I deserve "What were you thinking!!!" or "You were horrible last week" or even "Come on, Cara, snap out of it, get back on plan!!". So if you want to leave me any comments like that, I totally deserve every last one of them, so don't hold back on me.

I will say this, though, I AM BACK ON PLAN.

I started right after weigh in this morning. I've already journaled everything I've eaten today and was able to keep it below my 24 daily allotment of points, which I'll have to say I've not done in many, many months on a Saturday. Usually my Saturdays are where I used most, if not all, of my extra 35 points. But I'm going to try my hardest not to use them this weekend and save them for when I might need them during the week. I'm baking cookies and cupcakes for a bake sale this week and I know I'll be tempted to have one of each. So I'm sure I'll need the extra points.

So let me have it. Bad Cara!!!

P.S. I'm really bummed because I lost my favorite weigh in lady today. Charlotte has weighed me in since I started WW last May. She's quitting the weigh ins and training to be a leader. I'll miss her. I hope the next lady learns to weigh me like Charlotte. :(

Friday, April 4, 2008

thank goodness it's friday, but...

I'm so glad it's Friday, but then again, I'm not. Tomorrow is weigh in and I've been horrible this week.

I haven't journaled anything I ate.

Oh, sure, I give good advice... 'journaling is the key to weight loss' ... 'if you don't journal, you'll get off track and gain in no time' ... 'how do you know when you've had too much for the day unless you journal' ... etc., etc., etc.

But here I am, Friday night, less than 12 hours from weigh in and my journal for this week is completely blank.

Its showing on the scale, too.

On Monday, I was up a pound. By Wednesday morning, I was up two pounds. I kept telling myself... 'weight fluctuates during the week, I still have time to turn it around'. But did I? Uh, no.

And then I had the mentality of 'well, I'm up, I might as well enjoy myself if I'm going to gain'.

And so I did.

Wednesday night we went to a friends house to help her husband with his website and we had lasagna... real lasagna!!! With garlic bread and this yummy fruit mixture that was flavored with sugar and lime juice and topped with real heavy cream whipped topping. I'll bet the whole dinner as 30 points.

Now mind you, I'd already eaten through my 35 flex points last weekend. I think by Monday I had maybe 5 flex points left. And being as I only get 24 points a day, I think it's safe to say I went way over on Thursday.

To my surprise, when I woke up on Thursday morning, after the yummy lasagna dinner and I was down 2 pounds. WHAT??? Does that make any sense whatsoever???!!!

And because of the newly lost 2 pounds, I treated myself to a steak dinner Thursday night. I had a baked potato with real butter and real sour cream and these sauteed veggies that I'm sure were 10 points for the bunch of them.

It's like I just couldn't stop myself.

And so this morning, I was up a pound, so for lunch I decided to have this California Club sandwich from TGI Fridays that had swiss cheese, turkey, ham, avocado, mayo and 18 points attached to it. Not to mention the mashed potatoes.


Oh, yea, did I tell you I had a brownie this afternoon??? I made them last night completely from scratch with the saved chocolate bars melted in the pot and everything. By the way, they were 5 points each!!!

I'm off to have some left over pizza my daughter just brought home.

Somebody stop me!!!!

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

from the Biggest Loser to the rest of my life...

First, I want to say I'm sorry for dragging my feet and not posting on here for over a week. At first, I just needed a break from the computer. I'd spend hours in here at night researching, posting, commenting and before I knew it my nights were just gone. I work on a computer all day producing a magazine and then I'd come home and work on the computer producing my blog. I think I just needed to learn some balance in it all. I think I'm there now. I have a tendency to be a bit over compulsive about newly found hobbies. And I think that's what it was. But I'm back and will post regularly, now, but not obsess over this whole thing.

That being said...

I just got done watching Biggest Loser tonight and it was a really great show. They went to Australia, which is a place I've ALWAYS wanted to visit. And it was gorgeous!

My favorite part was this guy named Adro who was the winner in season one of the Australian version of BL. He came on and started talking about how weight loss is a thing that's in your heart and in your head and not something that you just do with your body. He talked about when he was on a challenge where he had to climb up a pole, I don't know how many stories tall, and jump off while harnessed. They showed hip perched up on that tiny platform hugging the wooden pole with his back to the edge. He wouldn't let go. He was petrified of heights. Bob was yelling at him to jump but he wouldn't. It took him a half hour before he managed to step out to the edge of the platform and jump. But the most amazing thing happened when he jumped. He said he had a kind of out of body experience where he felt the old, fat Adro separate from the new, thiner Adro as he fell down and by the time he got to the ground, his two halves came back together but he was never the same. He saw his old self and never wanted to go back to that person again. He vowed right then to never be obese again. It was very touching and very inspiring. I'll look for the video of it on YouTube and post it here when I find it. His talk with the current contestants was truly amazing.

I love that show, not just because of the hype of it, but because of how these peoples' lives have been transformed. Truly transformed. Not just by losing weight. And not just by the celebrity-ness of it all. But how their mental psyche has changed. How their very being is no longer the same as it has been in their previous lives.

Speaking from the perspective of a formerly obese person, I hope I can develop this type of psyche. I can already see I've taken on some of these characteristics. I want to truly learn how to eat better. I want to learn about the food I put in my body and what it's made of and what it's effects are on my body and mind. I want to learn how to exercise the best possible way for my body through the transitions of weight loss. But most importantly, I want to be able to keep this attitude, this drive, this passion for health and fitness for the rest of my life. I don't ever want to feel the way I used to feel when I was fat. I used to tell myself that I felt fine and I had high self esteem and that I was pretty and all of that. But I really think I was just trying to talk myself into believing something that was a total sham.

I wasn't just fat, I was obese. And I was truly embarrassed.

I remember (and I still have this problem sometimes) thinking that everyone was watching the fat lady eat and saying to themselves "look at that pig". I remember driving down the road and whenever I'd have to pass in front of a row of cars that was sitting at a red light that I'd always put my hand up to my face like I was scratching my head or something so it would shield my face from the people who were sitting there at the red light because I just knew they'd think "oh, look at that fat lady driving past, that's disgusting". To this day, I have a phobia about walking up behind a person in line at the grocery store because it's inevitable that the person in front of me will always turn around and look to see who just walked up behind them. And before, I just knew that when they turned around and saw me behind them, they'd think "wow, look at how fat she is, I wonder what kind of junk food she's buying to feed her face with tonight".

I can't believe I'm coming to terms with this now like this but it's been haunting me ever since high school when my metabolism changed and I gained 50 lbs in my senior year. From there it was all down hill. And from there is when I started hating the way I looked through other peoples' eyes.

I never want to feel that again.

I am taking a vow right here and right now to never be obese again. I will not allow myself to feel the way I've felt these past 25 years. My 25 years of obesity. Gone!

It's the new me. Like Adro said when he made it to the ground. The old me is still very much a part of who I am, but the new me will never allow the old me to surface again. It's just not going to happen.