i dream of powdered donuts...

Well, folks, I gained 2 POUNDS this past week. :,,[

Oh my gosh, I hate weight loss!

I'm so tired of sacrificing. I'm so tired of denial. I'm so tired of being so "dedicated" to it all. I just want to be 30 pounds lighter (excuse me, that's 32 pounds, now).

I think I might have to step up my game, now. My usual bag of tricks have stopped working.

Last week, I counted my points and only ate about half of my flex points. I exercised 4 days—biked for an hour 3 times and then walked for an hour once. But here was my problem... Last Saturday, we went to Aunt Edris' birthday party and I ate real food (home baked macaroni and cheese, smoked ham (not light), potato salad (real mayo), deviled eggs (mmmmm)) and I had a huge piece of birthday cake (of course the corner piece) and then a piece of chocolate cream pie. So when I weighed myself Sunday morning, I was up 2 pounds. Then, instead of getting back on track, we went out to breakfast before church and I got a real breakfast (sausage patty, egg beater omelet (with cheese) home fries (with grilled onions and peppers) and a huge piece of wheat toast with real butter and jam—the kind where the first ingredient is High Fructose Corn Syrup!). I was back on plan after that meal, though, but it didn't do any good because when I weighed myself Monday morning I was up another pound.

Then I couldn't get those 3 pounds off all week. Not until Friday when I finally dropped one pound.

So this weekend, I'm not splurging. I think I'm going to have to go die hard (ugh, I hate the sound of that). Because if I don't, I'm not going to make my 100 pound goal by Thanksgiving. Now I have 9 pounds to go and only 8 weigh ins left. So I'm behind the eight ball again.

I went biking yesterday. Though it was a leisure ride with my daughter, it was still exercise. I'm going to go again today. I'm trying to talk hubby into going with me, but if he doesn't go, I'll go by myself. I'm going to exercise 7 days this week. And so far, I haven't eaten any of my flex points. Yesterday I had a half a point left over. Today I'm doing good so far. We went out for breakfast again this week before church, but this time I was sensible. I had an egg beater, veggie omelet (no cheese) with oatmeal and wheat toast. The whole meal was 11 points (mainly because I had to use real butter and jam on my one piece of toast and real milk in my coffee and oatmeal).

I've already decided what my "congratulations splurge" food item will be when I hit 100 pounds—
a whole bag of powdered donuts (I'm sure I'll puke). These things have been haunting me for the past several months. I'm not usually a big fan of powdered donuts but I think because I haven't had any in a year and a half they're looking so good right now. I keep seeing them in the store EVERY TIME I go. It's like they're hiding just around the corner of every isle just waiting for me to pass buy so they can jump out in front of me and try to trip me. Most times, they don't actually trip me, but a couple of times, they've actually slapped me across the face. Don't they just look heavenly.

This past weekend in my WW meeting, the leader (we had a sub this week) was talking about denying ourselves of food—like on the "fad diets" and how it's not good to do because you'll end up binging. (On a side note, any weight loss program that tells me I can't eat what I want to is considered a diet to me. I mean, I get the whole "lifestyle" thing, but seriously, a diet means—you can't eat this or that. And on WW, I can't eat all the powdered donuts I want. That's a diet to me.) But anyways, here's my problem... I don't know how to eat these donuts without overeating. See, here's the problem. They come in a bag. There's like 50 of them in a bag (or 30 or however many there are). So say I was to buy the bag and only eat one—which I seriously think I could do. Then there are 49 more of them just glaring at me through the little cellophane window—EAT ME!!! Can you hear them? I can. And I know that the next day I'd have one. Then maybe another one in the afternoon. And many one more before dinner. They'd probably all be gone before the end of the third day in the house. I just don't see how I can satisfy my craving without overeating.

I thought about going to Dunkin Donuts or Krispy Kreme and getting one powdered donut. But, oh my gosh, there's no way I could even step one foot inside one of those places. I know I'd totally lose it and get just one more and maybe another one and before I left would have a whole dozen and have eaten half of them on the way home. I can't be trusted in a donut shop, that's for sure.

So I'll resign myself to setting that as my 100 pound goal and keep dreaming of that day.

Until then, sacrifice, deny, and under-indulge in EVERYTHING.

Oh, hey, I just found a link to Rocco's recipes from a couple of weeks ago on The Biggest Loser. Check these out. I'm definitely trying the Chicken Alfredo. You know how long it's been since I had Alfredo sauce?? I can't even remember!


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"18 Pounds in 18 Weeks"

Challenge Update! -
Week Eight (updates in bold below)

Bento Box Diet (sat WI) - No weigh in since week 4. Total loss 5.5 pounds. :[
Katschi (tues WI) - No weigh in since week 5. Total loss 3 pounds. :[
MaryFran (tues WI) - She was at 186.4 (I'm not sure if that was a gain or loss)
Karyn (mon WI) - Lost 2/10ths of a pound
Donna (mon WI) - No update from last week.
Spunkysuzi (sun WI) - Lost 1.2 pounds
Cathy (fri WI) - Lost 2.6 pounds
Christine K. Sader -

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